The beginning


This is the beginning, i guess, if we could call it that.
I want this to be a place where we can all connect, nothing is off limits, everything can be spoke about, there are no gender roles or gender specific anything.
I will tell stories about my life and share little inspirations to help anyone and everyone i can, with hope that is.

Lets start with a little about me, shall we?
We should probably go way back, so go ahead, grab a coffee, a tea, any beverage, this may be a long one.

On the 21st of april, 1994, I came into the world. We don’t need all the details of all that stuff.
I had a fairly okay childhood, i’ll just skim over it all and we can always come back to stories.
I had a mother, father and sister, we lived in a small town in new south wales of Australia.
i went to pre-school at the age of two, where i met a best friend of mine who is still in my life today.
From there, i went to a private religious school, i was there for a only a short amount of time before i was moved to a public school just up the road, i had friends in both schools, i wasn’t to worried.
I stayed in that school until my father got into a serious accident, he was on a bike and he was hit by a car, he was hospitalised for some time and then after he recovered, my parents bought a home, and we moved there, it wasn’t that far away, probably about 3 hours.
We bought a lovely home on a massive piece of land, it felt a little backwards, we didn’t have main power, we had solar power and generators, there was no mobile phone reception, it was a land line only, and at this stage, we only had dial up internet as well!
I went to the local primary school, it was fine, i guess. normal small town cliquey shit. I was an outsider, again but i settled in eventually.
After primary school, we had to go to high school, most people from out school went to the same school, there was only a few kids that went separate ways, luckily i got to go to high school with all the kids id been in primary school with, i wasn’t as nervous for the next step knowing they were by my side, you know?
That didn’t last long, within 2 days of high school, my “friends” decided i wasn’t cool enough and threw me aside.
I found another place, with new people all over again.
By this point things at home weren’t going so well, mum and dad were fighting a lot, my sister was turning into a teenage angst and i had no where to turn.
I started talking to people online, in doing so, i actually met some friends, including someone who would become my best friend over the next couple of years, honestly.
Talking to people online always seemed easier, they didn’t judge as hard, they didn’t have to see me everyday. My attitude started changing, i was becoming a teenage angst as well.
Within the first couple months of high school, i found myself, self harming, listening to heavier music, mixing with the wrong people and rebelling against anything and everything i could. This didn’t help things at home at all.
I was pushed down the stairs in year 7, by my ‘boyfriend’ at the time.
i was left with two broken ankles.
Taking some time off school to deal with that, trying to catch up on school work, i almost failed my first year of high school, but i didn’t.
Second year of high school was upon us, my attitude wasn’t any better, probably worse, in fact. My self harm got as bad as bringing the tools to do it in the bathroom at school, i was hanging around even worse people, skipping class, refusing to do class work when i actually turned up.
I started attempting suicide, i had become really bad with myself, my eating had pretty much stopped, i punished myself a lot.
By the end of year 8, in a fight with my mum, i had come out about sexual abuse and molestation id been going through since i was 3.
Not long after, we went to the appropriate authorities and worked through the situation. But it wasn’t over.
My parents had split up, living in two separate homes, they had filed for divorce and we were a broken home. My mum and dad decided to sell the house they’d bought together and go separate ways.
My sister got set up in a rental home with a friend while she finished schooling, while my mum and i moved to another town and i started school while she picked up work wherever she could.
My mum was helping pay my sisters rent as well as ours, things were tough.
i wasn’t settling into my school, i thought id made some friends, but they only wanted me for my height so i could get into physical fights for them.
i wasn’t even at this school for three months, and let me tell you, that was enough.
I decided to try a sort of home school system while my mum worked. I was doing really well. i completed all my classes with amazing grades.
I didn’t have any friends in this town, my mum was my only friend, she was on the dating scene at this point, i didn’t mind.
My mum met her life partner while we were there and within 6 month, we packed up and moved to the city with him, together as a family.
Still doing my homeschooling, hanging out with my mum and her boyfriend, things were looking up.
Within the year, i got myself a part time job, as a sushi chef. I worked there for over 2 years while still studying at home and getting my good grades.
My mum was working in a supermarket at this point, a stable, full time job, which was incredible. I was lucky enough for her to be able to land me some casual shifts there as well, so now i had 2 jobs while studying! i worked the two jobs for almost a year, eventually i stopped studying, i wish i didn’t but i couldn’t handle it.
Not long after, i stopped working at sushi and just kept working at the supermarket, i was getting almost full-time hours between a couple of departments.
At this stage, my mum had moved out with her boyfriend and it was just me, in the house, living alone, but it was okay, i kinda liked it actually.
i lived alone for awhile actually.
I met my now husband online, through mutual friends. we went on a first date and from then on, we’ve been inseparable.
Within 3 months of being together, we moved into our first little apartment, which we stayed for 6 months, before we decide to move back to where i grew up. we found a little cottage by the beach and set up life there.
A month after we moved, he proposed, of course i said yes!
It took us just under 2 years to be married, it was small and perfect.
It took a while but we both have work now, and we’re still in our cottage today.

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